Mark Uncategorised 4 Comments

It Started with a Dab

It started with a dab.

At first I thought he’d had a seizure. Then I assumed it must be a tribute to Thriller. An attempt at the YMCA in the style of his own illegible handwriting?

He wasn’t entertaining my questions.

“Whateves.”

Ooh, I know this one. You can put your urban dictionary away, this dad has skillz in the spoken word of the yoof. It means whatever. The curled lip of disdain flows more naturally from an S that an R, you see. Try it. Besides, R’s are so last century. S is the new…

“You’re so durpy!”

Eh, what? Durpy? Have they been watching that YouTuber with the thick Yorkshire accent again? Does he mean dopey?

“Jeez, you’re such a noob!”

Whoa, back up there young fella, we’ve no dealt with durpy yet!

“Hashtag OMG forward-slash LOL!”

Oh c’mon. Right, don’t move, let me grab my pen and paper.

#OMG/LOL.

Wow. When written down that’s an entire sentence containing not a single word of English. In fact, that’s not a sentence at all, it’s an error message.

“Come on Luca, dad’s OP’d!”

Now they’re just taking the piss.

Does the infinite monkey theorem work on kids? Given enough time and typewriters, would they eventually produce a sentence that’s recognisable to the over-40s?

“DAAAAAAD! Sonny’s done a Donald in my face and it stinks!”

Ah, that’s less urban dictionary, more dictionary of dad. Not sure there is a suitable response to that.

Sorry, what’s that Luca?

“Euuugh, poo emoji!”

I give up.

Comments 4

  1. Tracy

    Damien has started picking up such language entwined with fluent Pokemon, I have absolutely no idea what he’s on about anymore so I just nod and smile and that’s my advice to you, Mark..just nod and smile. 😉

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      Mark

      Advice taken, thanks. I have started occasionally repeating what they say back to them to give the impression I understood. They know I didn’t.

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